Sidetracks

Hey, it's another one of those 'crap' I need to let go again. Basically, I can safely say that I am at least alittle slimmer than before, but hey, I don't think it's enough! My sister, and a whole lot of people have been trying their best to coax me out of this hey-I-ain't-gonna-eat habit of mine. You see, each time I feel that I had eaten too much over a short period of time, I just have this guilt, and somehow, feel that I need to pay that guilt back. Some call this illness, Anorexia Nervosa, I know what the hell that is too, but hey, I AM NOT SUFFERING FROM IT. It's just that, it took me quite awhile to get down to the size you see now, (just compare the pictures) I am starting to get confused as to whether I should eat or shouldn't. My sister tells me that, I need to eat, because it's my growing age, and if I do not seize the opportunity to eat and grow now, I might end up, (touch wood) being short and stumpy, which is obviously not my choice of build. But even as I want to be tall, I also don't ever want to be 'fat' anymore, (no offence to the big people reading this, being 'fat' is fine, but not for me, that's all) and be mocked at. No, I ain't doing this slimming down business for others to stop mocking me, instead, I just want to make myself feel good, but somehow, that feeling is being shrouded with confusing elements such as "hey, you must eat" and "if you eat, you will balloon again". God, if only being slim was easy, then I wouldn't have to run those irritating five rounds anymore, (yes, I hate exercising, but it's become a part of my life ever since I lost weight doing it) and if only sitting down could burn fats away, but hey, nothing's free in this world, and when it comes to weight loss, hardwork and determination's definitely needed. (SO WHO'S UP FOR SOME BANANA CAKE?) (Above: My present self. Below: What I used to be.)